honest to goodness direct quotes from todays trio rehearsal with cellist Robert who I want to obliviate from planet earth.

Andrew: "why are you playing forte there Robert?"
Robert: "because its a cello solo"
Andrew: "no its not, it doesn't say solo"
Robert: "yes it does, right after my pizz"
Andrew: "oh, so arco means solo?"

Robert: "we'd better hurry, we only have five minutes left"
Andrew, looking at the clock, "ten"
Robert: "some see five, some see ten. . ."

Andrew: "Gosh Robert you don't need to get so emotional there"
Robert: "the only important part is my part."
Andrew: "ooookkaaay. cry me a river!"

Robert: "I'm tired."
Robert: "My bow arm is hurting"

Robert: "lllllaaaaahhhhh laaaaaaaaaahhhhh llllllllllaaaaaaahhhhhhh!"
Melissa: "Robert, stop singing your solos".
Robert: "but they're the only good part."

Andrew: "Robert, can you play the triplets yet?"
Robert: "not now, my *%@**$# 'n hand hurts"
Andrew: "well, are you going to learn them?"
Robert: "look its not my fault I don't know the triplets"

Melissa: "okay, lets run the first movement without stopping"
Robert: " . . . . . . ."
Melissa: "any day now"
Robert: "just a minute. I had a massage, as I usually do, and he didn't massage my shoulder, so I can't use my arm."